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Saturday, May 23, 2009

It's Just Too Short...that's why.

So, tonight I had the privilege of being included in a Graduation Celebration. A little boy (now young man...adult)that I nannied for many moons ago finished high school and will be moving on to college. I started keeping Aaron and his sister, Andrea, when they were 4 and 6. I didn't keep them for years or anything, but the time that I did spend with them was sweet, and created a lasting friendship. As I looked at his little pictures and watched him grow through the years I was that much more convinced of what I'm doing.

It was only 13 very short years ago that I spent a few days with them at the beach. It was only 13 short years ago that we pretended my Geo Metro was a racecar and sang Sugar Beats at the top of our lungs. Now, he's finished. Graduated.

My children sat there eating cake and taking bags full of candy from Aaron's grandmother and I just thought...they are next. As we put them to bed I wasn't as irritated with all of the clutter. The baby dolls, the clothes, the Little People, books, socks, random shoes...it won't be here for long. Anni's bookshelves no longer hold the books and toys that they held when I was there. They hold picture frames and beautiful shells. There are no Lego pieces littering her living room. No pictures of stick figures with "Julia" written all over them. It's all tidy. All clean. All finished. Anni is an INCREDIBLE mother and is in no way "finished" with her parenting. I have learned a tremendous amount from her and will continue to, I'm sure. This summer she is meeting Andrea in Paris while Andrea finishes her study abroad, Anni will meet her there and they'll explore together. She is in a new phase.

I just think of when my house will stay clean. No crumbs on the floor. No trips to the potty whenever we are in a new place. I'm sure it will be a sweet place. A sweet phase of life, but so is this.

When people confess that they couldn't spend all day with their kids, my heart breaks. I don't want to spend my days with anyone else. I want to wring this time out. I want to laugh and cry and sing and dance...with them. Then, when we have a party to celebrate their graduation, I'll be ready for the next stage. I'll be excited. I'll be thankful that I enjoyed it all.

Homeschooling will provide my children with a better education. (Yea, I said it.) They will have amazing opportunities. They will, I pray, graduate with passion and purpose. Those are all great things, but above all of these is Love. I pray that they will love one another. Love Mike and myself, but most importantly Love Christ the Giver of all good gifts. He gave me 3 good gifts (4 if you count their Dad) and I'm homeschooling them because life is simply too short.